So it’s snowing here in OKC. And its cold. And I’ve been working all day on sales calls and I had the TV on just for noise. You know the kind of noise…the kind that doesn’t mean anything to you. It’s not significant noise. It’s just keep ya company sort of noise. And then all of a sudden I hear “don’t quit! don’t you quit on me!” being shouted from the TV. And I turned from my computer and looked at the television. Facing the Giants. It’s one of the best movies that captures the faithfulness of God that I’ve ever seen. And so I sat. And I watched this movie unfold. And I cried like a girl.
And I’m not talking my eyes got teary. OH no. I’m talking, full on, sit in my chair and cry with noise. Why did this resonate so deep within me today?
Giants. I’ve been facing my own giants. It seems there have been a season of giants. Like 7 years of them. And do you ever wanna just lay down and QUIT? When your heart hurts, people disappoint you, you are trying to hear God because you fervently just want to be in His will…. The right relationships. Giants The right jobs. Giants The right places to live. Giants And…You miss it a few times. Or so it feels like you have missed it because the “thing” that you were believing for didn’t turn out the way you thought?
And you feel foolish because…well, you thought you had heard God but apparently you missed God. And life isn’t a Disney movie and things sometimes suck and you feel like day in and day out you put one foot in front of the other believing that you are making progress only to stop and wonder… “am I really!?”
And that Disney movie seems like a farse because quite frankly, I haven’t gotten my tiara out in years. And actually, I got it out recently to look at it…and that tiara had a few rhinestones that had fallen out. And behold…the princess is much less in the castle and much more hiding out in the desert just waiting to possess what she knows…what she’s being promised…is her rightful place of inheritance. The Kingdom. Kingdom living.
The kingdom seems far off and the desert is just that. It’s the desert.
But oh the desert. And…what if you didn’t miss God at all? Maybe all of it was designed for divine positioning into the Kingdom? And when I say Kingdom living…I mean…the abundant life. The life that is full of destiny and promise and you know that you know you’ve really hit your sweet spot….People getting healed and set free and trouble seems to flee…kingdom living. What if every tear was actually water for the ground you’ve been sowing in. Ground that will reap harvest if you do not faint…
“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”
And it hit me today while watching that high school player doing the death crawl blind folded…..first to the 20 yard line….then to the 30….then to the 40…..and then with every step gasping, struggling and believing that surely he was close to the 50 but since he was blindfolded he couldn’t see exactly where he was but he hurt so bad that even if he wasn’t close…the pain was almost more then he could bear. Giants, giants, giants… Surely he was about to get to what he had set out for…the 50 yard line. But his coach kept urging him forward….leading him. Guiding him. “Don’t you quit on me!”
So he kept going…and he was tired.
The burden of the boy on his back seemed more than he could bear. Giants. And he wanted to quit. But he didn’t. Another 5 steps. Giants. And he wanted to quit again. Giants. And finally he just felt his muscles tingle and burn and his breath give way….and his coach yelling…5 more steps, 2 more, 1 more…you made it!
You possessed the goal…and instead of the 50….he was in a better promised land. He had gone farther then he intended to. Farther than he thought possible in the natural. Farther then anyone expected him to go, actually. And it was painful. And nothing about it was pleasant.
Every muscle in his body was on fire.
And all he could do was lay at the foot of those field goal bars. Exhausted. But in position. A BETTER position that he thought possible. A DIVINE position…a WINNING position. His coach telling him at the end…”I need you. You are an influencer. Nobody else can do what you do. You were created for MORE to be more to give more. You’re a LEADER…”
And so I wept as I realized. I’m stronger than I think. And all the setbacks…..what if they’ve actually been set ups for a come back? And what if I really haven’t missed God at all? What if in my weakness, I landed at the foot of the cross…and with every fiber in my tired body and weary heart with nobody around but just me and God…what if that was the plan all along?
It’s in the desert when you can’t see the whole picture…. that God is faithful. It’s in the desert that He wants our praise. It’s in the desert that He calls US to be faithful regardless of hurts and pain….and it’s in the desert that sometimes one more step is the very step that positions us at the foot of the cross. Just. Don’t. Quit.
And so I sit here tonight….weary, a little disheveled, contemplating some decisions…and realizing…that quitting isn’t an option and that God will take me further than I think I can go. And so I’ll put my blindfold on tonight….and again in the morning…and I’ll wear that blindfold like a uniform of FAITH….and I will push myself and land at the foot of the cross again tomorrow night.
And I win. Because I really think it’s less about the destination and more about everyday landing at the foot of the cross.
So in the desert or in the castle…I will praise Him. And in the heat of the day. I will praise Him. And when I feel like I cannot go on and this death crawl called life just isn’t fair….I will praise Him. And what about those giants? The things that stand in the way of me making it to the foot of the cross everyday…to my victory. To my END ZONE. Trust this, my friends, the field of battle will be peppered with carcasses of the giants….strewn about…defeated.
“David asked the men standing near him, “What will be done for the man who kills this Philistine and removes this disgrace from Israel? Who is this uncircumcised Philistine that he should defy the armies of the living God?”
1 Samuel 17:26
Out of my MOUTH I will say….”God, you are my God. There is none like you. You keep me from all evil. You rebuke the devil for my sake. You always provide more abundantly for my needs. Every concern I have…. I give to you to carry. I love you. I trust you. God you are GOOD TO ME and your faithfulness endures everyday and forever!”
You should click on the link below. Grab your cocoa and your tissue….Cause you will realize something at the end of this clip….you win too. #dontquit